TJ Dillashaw Simply Doesn't Care What People Think

He didn’t try to fight the results or feign surprise at having tested positive, choosing instead to accept his suspension in full while making it clear that this was his decision and his decision alone. His right arm braced in a sling following shoulder surgery, he apologized to his family, friends, coaches, and teammates, acknowledging that he wanted to use this situation as a way to teach his young son, Bronson, that you deal with the mistakes you make by addressing them head-on, not by pretending they don’t exist or running way.

“It was definitely a tough decision to do it, but it was the only way,” the returning fighter remarked, reflecting on his decision handle things the way he did. “Running and hiding from it, I feel like it I would have continued to have this mental effect on me.

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“Whether you see a sports psychologist or a psychiatrist, you learn that people need to talk about their situations and that’s what usually helps them get through what they’ve done, and my best way of talking about it was telling the world what I did. I wanted to own up to it so I could get past it, where if I would have been hiding it, I would still be dealing with that bull****.

“I would still be dealing with having to explain myself, but I’ve already done all that and I get to move on.”

Over the last two years, Dillashaw has most certainly moved on, using his time away as an opportunity to set himself up for life after fighting and spend time with his son that he wouldn’t otherwise have given himself if he were preparing to compete every four to six months.

Luckily, Dillashaw has an easy way of dealing with it.

“To be honest, I don’t really give a s*** what everyone thinks,” he said, laughing. “I’m able to live life and get past it.

“That first six months was rough, man; I’m not going to lie to you — it was a tough situation to go from being on top of the world to where I went, but I feel good with it now.”

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Dillashaw has been in the spotlight since he first popped up on the UFC radar as a member of Team Bisping on Season 14 of The Ultimate Fighter, where he made his way to the finals before losing to John Dodson.

Throughout his career, he’s been known for his maniacal competitiveness, a trait that has helped him reach the top of the bantamweight division twice, but that’s also been used to cast the returning fighter as a careless, sometimes dangerous, teammate and poor sport.

Now, as he readies to make the walk to face Sandhagen this weekend, he has the weight of his mistakes on his shoulders, as well, increasing the scrutiny and pressure hovering over this fight and whatever may come next.

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For some, it would be too much to bear.

For Dillashaw, it’s exactly where he wants to be.

“I’m pumped to get back in there; I love the pressure,” he said, his excitement and eagerness to return to action evident in his voice. “I’m a guy that performs better under pressure. I perform even better when the lights are on and I get to show off; all the eyes are on me.

“F*** man, everyone loves a comeback story and I think this would be a great one,” he added. “Becoming a three-time champion in the UFC, coming back to reclaim my belt, come through all this adversity…”

Even before stepping in with Sandhagen this weekend, Dillashaw knows there will be some that have no interest in seeing him rise through the ranks to challenge for the title again or want him to have a longer road as a result of his prior mistake.

No matter what happens on Saturday, he knows the scrutiny will be ever-present and some will forever want to deny him another opportunity to fight for UFC gold.

Just like everything else in this comeback, he’s ready for it, and he has a plan for how to deal with it.

“To be honest, I’m too f****** good; I’m too good for those things to be taken away,” he said when asked about the barriers that some will erect in front of him no matter what. “I’m going to come back, have a great performance, and I won’t be denied; it’s inevitable.”

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Everything changed for Dillashaw two years ago, and while he’d never choose to experience things the same way if given the chance to do it again, it has brought him to a point where his reasons for stepping into the Octagon this weekend are dramatically different than they were in the past.

He’s no longer fighting to provide for his family and secure their future; those things are taken care of, and the next chapter of his life — the one that takes place outside of mixed martial arts — is already being written.

Now, he’s fighting because he wants to, because he loves it, and that ultra-competitive side gets to lead the dance, making him a different kind of animal heading into this weekend.

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“These two years have been a true blessing,” he said once more. “I would never choose to do it the way I did it if I had it to do over again; I would never want that to happen, I wouldn’t have taken that fight, but it was a blessing because I know what I’m going to do once I’m done fighting and so now there isn’t that pressure (to provide for my family).

“It’s a different mentality going out there; I get to do it just for myself now,” he added. “It’s different and we’ll see how that translates into my performance, but I’m obviously hoping, and expecting, for it to be great.”